On the 12th of July I flew together with Olga from Kharkov to Germany to attend the wedding of Damodara-priya Mataji and Gopal Sundara Prabhu at Goloka Dham. This event was so important to me, that I decided to interrupt my writing retreat and specially fly to Germany to participate in this wonderful celebration.
I had known Damodara-priya Mataji for more than ten years - she had been living in the temple for around eighteen years and had given her life and soul to serving Radha Madhana Mohan in Goloka Dham. She had never even played with the idea to get married and was determined to fully dedicate herself to living the life of a renounced nun. However, over the years her health started to protest more and more severely, and gradually turned so bad that she could not continue her dedicated service to the Deities.
It had taken her several years of internal work to reach the point of accepting the fact, that it would be helpful if not to say necessary for her to enter married life. Such step was certainly not maya's work on her, but rather the opposite: it was Radha Madana Mohan's mercy, revealing to her and all of us, how important it is for most ladies - and also for her - to be properly situated within family life in order to be emotionally balanced and fulfilled. Only when the subtle body receives such care and is strong and healthy, can we whole-heartedly give ourselves in service to the Lord and His devotees. No matter how serious and sincere we may be - unless we are stably situated in our ashram, we don't have the required strength to apply ourselves in the process of devotional service. Since, as a rule, we ladies are given a more emotional nature, we are meant to be situated at least for some time of our life within marriage. It is Krishna's divine plan. If we try to go against it, we may receive undesired reactions.
I had been accompanying Damodara-priya Mataji on her internal journey towards entering marriage, and now, at the age of 45, she was embarking on this new phase in her life. This memorable event deserved to be celebrated with great joy! And I certainly did not want to miss it.....
It had taken her several years of internal work to reach the point of accepting the fact, that it would be helpful if not to say necessary for her to enter married life. Such step was certainly not maya's work on her, but rather the opposite: it was Radha Madana Mohan's mercy, revealing to her and all of us, how important it is for most ladies - and also for her - to be properly situated within family life in order to be emotionally balanced and fulfilled. Only when the subtle body receives such care and is strong and healthy, can we whole-heartedly give ourselves in service to the Lord and His devotees. No matter how serious and sincere we may be - unless we are stably situated in our ashram, we don't have the required strength to apply ourselves in the process of devotional service. Since, as a rule, we ladies are given a more emotional nature, we are meant to be situated at least for some time of our life within marriage. It is Krishna's divine plan. If we try to go against it, we may receive undesired reactions.
I had been accompanying Damodara-priya Mataji on her internal journey towards entering marriage, and now, at the age of 45, she was embarking on this new phase in her life. This memorable event deserved to be celebrated with great joy! And I certainly did not want to miss it.....
It was a grandiose festival - maybe the nicest wedding I had ever attended - with many devotees coming from all around Germany. The head pujar from Vrindavan, Mukunda Datta Prabhu, performed the yajna which contributed in auspiciousness. Also senior devotees such as Vaidyanath Prabhu, the brother of Sacinandana Swami and disciple of Srila Prabhupada, had accepted the long journey coming all the way from Hamburg to attend the event, together with his good wife.
Everything was so well organised and tastefully arranged - with sweet little details! After a sumptuous feast and a little rest, we congregated once again in the garden in kirtan, funny little games for the newly wedded couple and speeches of senior devotees. It was a beautiful day in all auspiciousness and harmony! Even her elderly mother and brother with family had come from Switzerland to attend the occasion, which added further sweetness and a spirit of preaching.
Everything was so well organised and tastefully arranged - with sweet little details! After a sumptuous feast and a little rest, we congregated once again in the garden in kirtan, funny little games for the newly wedded couple and speeches of senior devotees. It was a beautiful day in all auspiciousness and harmony! Even her elderly mother and brother with family had come from Switzerland to attend the occasion, which added further sweetness and a spirit of preaching.
And many of us could already witness how Damodara-priya Mataji blossomed, with her feminine beauty unfolding....! All those years until now it had been supressed and hidden - like a rose in its bud, which is not allowed to manifest its full beauty. Very often, we ladies tend to dry up emotionally unless we are happily situated in our ashram.
I couldn't help but remembering when I entered married life - twenty-nine years ago in Sydney/Australia. One day, my temple president had called me in his office and said: "Devaki, you will turn thirty this year! And a woman should be married before she turns thirty! So who do you want to marry?" And surely enough - a few months later, just before I turned thirty, I found myself sitting in the fire yajna together with another couple, getting married to Guruttama Das - the man of my choice, who had been a brahmacari for seven years.....!
I couldn't help but remembering when I entered married life - twenty-nine years ago in Sydney/Australia. One day, my temple president had called me in his office and said: "Devaki, you will turn thirty this year! And a woman should be married before she turns thirty! So who do you want to marry?" And surely enough - a few months later, just before I turned thirty, I found myself sitting in the fire yajna together with another couple, getting married to Guruttama Das - the man of my choice, who had been a brahmacari for seven years.....!
Unless my temple president had pushed me in such a well-wishing way, I might not have so easily succumbed to accept this step. As we know, traditionally it is the highly important duty and responsibility of the father to get his daughter married. If he does not arrange a nice husband for her, he is considered her worst enemy. Since many of our devotees have parents who are not practicing Krishna consciousness, other authorities and well-wishing seniors have to play the role of assuring that a woman enters marriage at a suitable age. We should not leave this up to some coincidence to somehow happen.....
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A wedding should be celebrated with great pomp - it should be a grandiose event. The bride should be beautifully decorated in fine cloth and jewelry, so that her husband is overwhelmed by her beauty and convinced that he married the most beautiful lady on earth. I remember my temple president commenting to me on the day of my wedding: "Devaki, I didn't even know how beautiful you are.....!"
All the friends and family members should come from far and wide, witnessing the occasion, offering blessings and gifts. And the newly wedded couple should extend their hospitality, feed everyone sumptuously with prasadam and give in charity to the seniors, expressing their gratitude for their attendance. It should be celebrated in such beautiful and grandiose style, that we cannot so easily pretend that it never happened! We cannot cancel it so easily. The seniors attending are also offering to give their further guidance in the future, and thus the newly wedded couple feels secure and protected on their future journey through married life - confident that any challenge can be overcome by the help and guidance of their senior well-wishers and friends.
Traditionally, a wedding even lasts three to five days, with the whole village participating....!
Damodara-priya Mataji's wedding with Gopal Sundara Prabhu was indeed a beautiful and sweet festival - I was happy that I didn't miss it.....!
Your servant, Devaki dd
All the friends and family members should come from far and wide, witnessing the occasion, offering blessings and gifts. And the newly wedded couple should extend their hospitality, feed everyone sumptuously with prasadam and give in charity to the seniors, expressing their gratitude for their attendance. It should be celebrated in such beautiful and grandiose style, that we cannot so easily pretend that it never happened! We cannot cancel it so easily. The seniors attending are also offering to give their further guidance in the future, and thus the newly wedded couple feels secure and protected on their future journey through married life - confident that any challenge can be overcome by the help and guidance of their senior well-wishers and friends.
Traditionally, a wedding even lasts three to five days, with the whole village participating....!
Damodara-priya Mataji's wedding with Gopal Sundara Prabhu was indeed a beautiful and sweet festival - I was happy that I didn't miss it.....!
Your servant, Devaki dd
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