We returned from Ekachakra to Mayapur on the 28th of February - the first day of the Kirtan Mela...
Our Holy Name Retreat at Nityananda's birth place had been an excellent preparation of our consciousness and heart to more deeply absorb ourselves in chanting the holy name during the upcoming Kirtan Mela.
Every day I joined the kirtans performed by my favorite kirtaniyas - mainly HH Niranjana Swami, Madhava Prabhu and others. The temple room in front of Pancha Tattva was wonderfully decorated and transformed into a sublime kirtan arena. And it was marvellous, seeing thousands of devotees from all around the world coming together to congregationally chant the Holy Name here in Mayapur. Coming from the secluded Ekachakra it was almost a little overwhelming. Bhaktivinoda Thakur's prediction was certainly coming more and more true...
Our Holy Name Retreat at Nityananda's birth place had been an excellent preparation of our consciousness and heart to more deeply absorb ourselves in chanting the holy name during the upcoming Kirtan Mela.
Every day I joined the kirtans performed by my favorite kirtaniyas - mainly HH Niranjana Swami, Madhava Prabhu and others. The temple room in front of Pancha Tattva was wonderfully decorated and transformed into a sublime kirtan arena. And it was marvellous, seeing thousands of devotees from all around the world coming together to congregationally chant the Holy Name here in Mayapur. Coming from the secluded Ekachakra it was almost a little overwhelming. Bhaktivinoda Thakur's prediction was certainly coming more and more true...
Since we had scheduled the inauguration of the Institute for Spiritual Culture for the 5th of March I was also busy planning all the necessary arrangements for this event, and distributing flyers and brochures. At the same time I was eager to invite devotees from various parts of the world to visit me in my ashram at the Goshala for some little prasadam - a most important loving exchange. And I also had some matajis from Germany staying with me. So times were very busy, but blissful...
On the 3rd of March was the Maha Abhishek of Sri Sri Pancha Tattva - an event which takes place only every five years. And thousands of devotees had arrived in Mayapur to witness this transcendental event!
On the 3rd of March was the Maha Abhishek of Sri Sri Pancha Tattva - an event which takes place only every five years. And thousands of devotees had arrived in Mayapur to witness this transcendental event!
The managers of Mayapur had planned a system where the crowds of devotees were encouraged to move along a certain one-way path in and out the temple room in order to give everyone a chance to get darshan of the Deities. In previous years this had been arranged with bamboo rods blocking off certain areas within the temple room and thus controlling the flow of the crowds. But this year there was no bamboo demarcations, and as a result of this the security guards lost entire control over the huge masses of devotees pushing into the Pancha Tattva temple room from all sides.
Just like on the previous Maha Abhishek five years ago I was determined to remain in the Pancha Tattva temple room, and I had reserved a little sitting place for myself near the pillars coming from Radha Madhava's to Pancha Tattva's temple room. What initially seemed a very good spot to view the entire Abhishek turned out to be a most dangerous one: masses of devotees pushed more and more forcefully into the Pancha Tattva temple room, which was very threatening for those who were already there. It was getting impossible for me to sit, since I felt the danger of people simply crushing in and trampling over me.
For the following two hours I was heavily pushed around in the crowds which had become so dense and uncontrollable that it was impossible to even move around or go anywhere. I simply tried to tolerate the external disturbances, all the while intensely chanting along in the kirtan, and keeping my eyes fixed on the beautiful sight of the Deities being bathed.
Just like on the previous Maha Abhishek five years ago I was determined to remain in the Pancha Tattva temple room, and I had reserved a little sitting place for myself near the pillars coming from Radha Madhava's to Pancha Tattva's temple room. What initially seemed a very good spot to view the entire Abhishek turned out to be a most dangerous one: masses of devotees pushed more and more forcefully into the Pancha Tattva temple room, which was very threatening for those who were already there. It was getting impossible for me to sit, since I felt the danger of people simply crushing in and trampling over me.
For the following two hours I was heavily pushed around in the crowds which had become so dense and uncontrollable that it was impossible to even move around or go anywhere. I simply tried to tolerate the external disturbances, all the while intensely chanting along in the kirtan, and keeping my eyes fixed on the beautiful sight of the Deities being bathed.
Towards the very end of the abhishek it was getting very hot in the temple room, with a lack of oxygen, and I gradually could feel my blood pressure dropping, until I knew I would fall unconscious.
I managed to warn the mataji next to me that I would faint within a minute, and then I was gone - collapsing to the ground. Some security guards managed to drag me out of the temple room, when I finally regained consciousness. I was very weak and hardly able to stand up. And my body immediately rejected every drop of water I tried to drink - my entire bodily system had shut down.
Several devotees kindly took care of me and drove me back to my place at the goshala. It took me the entire afternoon to gradually get back on my feet.
One thing was pretty amazing: while I was unconscious I continued hearing the kirtan and saw the Deities within my mind. And it was a most beautiful experience - free from all these external disturbances and chaos. Infact, it was the most sublime part of the entire abhishek for me. When I came back to consciousness I was so disappointed to return to external reality, realizing that the wonderful experience was part of my unconscious state.
Nevertheless, it was reassuring that Krsna had kindly agreed to remain present within my mind. After all, from Him comes knowledge, rememberance and forgetfulness. It is up to His sweet will whether He agrees to appear within our mind, or not.
On the same evening, after recovering from the whole experience I suddenly felt the urge to contact Gaur Hari Prabhu, the manager of the goshala. I had discussed with him the details of the arrangement for our inauguration program sceduled for the 5th of March, but I had not seen any preparations being made in regards to building the Pandal, etc. And the program would be after two days. When speaking to him we realized that he had misunderstood the dates, thinking that the inauguration program would be on the 15th - not the 5th. I almost fainted again! What a disaster! In two days the program was supposed to take place, and he had made the arrangements for the wrong date, ten days later....!
But Gaura Hari Prabhu is a man of action. He simply starred at me with wide opened eyes and said: "Come back in one hour - I will make some phone calls....". And surely enough, within one hour some Bengali men from the nearby villages came and started preparing the area to build the Pandal for the inauguration program. We quickly discussed and finalized all the necessary arrangements, and the work continued throughout the whole night.....
When taking rest that evening I could sense a strong feeling of helplessly depending on Krsna's guidance and overall control....
Your servant, Devaki dd
I managed to warn the mataji next to me that I would faint within a minute, and then I was gone - collapsing to the ground. Some security guards managed to drag me out of the temple room, when I finally regained consciousness. I was very weak and hardly able to stand up. And my body immediately rejected every drop of water I tried to drink - my entire bodily system had shut down.
Several devotees kindly took care of me and drove me back to my place at the goshala. It took me the entire afternoon to gradually get back on my feet.
One thing was pretty amazing: while I was unconscious I continued hearing the kirtan and saw the Deities within my mind. And it was a most beautiful experience - free from all these external disturbances and chaos. Infact, it was the most sublime part of the entire abhishek for me. When I came back to consciousness I was so disappointed to return to external reality, realizing that the wonderful experience was part of my unconscious state.
Nevertheless, it was reassuring that Krsna had kindly agreed to remain present within my mind. After all, from Him comes knowledge, rememberance and forgetfulness. It is up to His sweet will whether He agrees to appear within our mind, or not.
On the same evening, after recovering from the whole experience I suddenly felt the urge to contact Gaur Hari Prabhu, the manager of the goshala. I had discussed with him the details of the arrangement for our inauguration program sceduled for the 5th of March, but I had not seen any preparations being made in regards to building the Pandal, etc. And the program would be after two days. When speaking to him we realized that he had misunderstood the dates, thinking that the inauguration program would be on the 15th - not the 5th. I almost fainted again! What a disaster! In two days the program was supposed to take place, and he had made the arrangements for the wrong date, ten days later....!
But Gaura Hari Prabhu is a man of action. He simply starred at me with wide opened eyes and said: "Come back in one hour - I will make some phone calls....". And surely enough, within one hour some Bengali men from the nearby villages came and started preparing the area to build the Pandal for the inauguration program. We quickly discussed and finalized all the necessary arrangements, and the work continued throughout the whole night.....
When taking rest that evening I could sense a strong feeling of helplessly depending on Krsna's guidance and overall control....
Your servant, Devaki dd
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