For many years I had heard about the glories of the Ratha Yatra Festival in Durban - a 4-day event which takes place traditionally every year over Easter. This year, I finally had the opportunity to take part. We had HH Indradyumna Maharaja, HH Bhakti Caitanya Maharaja and HH Bhakti Marg Swami with his famous drama group gracing the event.
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Three big carts were pulled along the beach promenade led by another cart with a huge Deity of Mahaprabhu. And every cart had of course their own kirtan party. I had the good fortune of riding on Baladeva's cart which gave me a wonderful view to observe the entire festival from above. Many devotees had come from all corners of South Africa, and some even from other African countries and also Europe. People of all cultural backgrounds received the mercy by pulling the carts and getting Their Lordship's darshan while chanting the holy name. Heading up Lord Baladeva's cart, HH Indradyumna Maharaja led a vibrant kirtan, followed by kirtaniyas of the younger generation.
The entire festival is turned into a big outreach program in the mood of Indradyumna Maharaja's festivals - with many tents offering a variety of activities to attract new people. In the main tent were all kinds of local celebrities offering various performances, and devotees offering dramas and other presentations. The location of the festival site was excellent - along the beach promenade of the city of Durban.
I was invited to offer several talks in the Seminar Tent, another session in the Q&A Tent and a session in the Kids' Tent.
The entire festival is turned into a big outreach program in the mood of Indradyumna Maharaja's festivals - with many tents offering a variety of activities to attract new people. In the main tent were all kinds of local celebrities offering various performances, and devotees offering dramas and other presentations. The location of the festival site was excellent - along the beach promenade of the city of Durban.
I was invited to offer several talks in the Seminar Tent, another session in the Q&A Tent and a session in the Kids' Tent.
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Sometimes we hear devotees make the statement “I don’t want to have children”. This is an attitude that reflects a rather materialistic consciousness. In material life, the criterion for making decisions is: 'What do I want? Is the proposal pleasing to my mind and senses? Do I like it?' Such contemplation takes place on the level of the mind, which sets a very unreliable and flickering foundation for making important decisions. Today our mind may like a certain idea, but reject it promptly tomorrow. A materialist who takes instructions from the uncontrolled mind is doomed to become its slave.
When contemplating the idea of having children with a spiritual mindset, our question should not be ‘Do I want to have children?’ We should instead ask, ‘Is it beneficial for me to have children? Will it facilitate my purification and spiritual advancement?’ This approach reflects an entirely different consciousness. We leave ourselves open, and are ready to accept whatever is advisable for our purification – whatever Krishna and His devotees advise. It reflects a mood of submission, whereas the mundane approach reflects a mood of ‘I know best what is good for me.’
In spiritual life, the matter of concern is not what I like; it is rather what is recommended by our gurus, sadhus and the shastra.
After understanding the sacred purpose of sexuality served by the conception of a child, it becomes clear that there is not much room for the idea of entering marriage on the condition that one won’t have children. Otherwise, how will we engage our sexual desires in Krishna’s service and thereby purify it?
As a rule, when husband and wife live together, by the laws of nature, there will be sexual attraction. Let us remember that a most common reason for a man to enter family life is that he finds it difficult to control his senses and remain celibate lifelong. Otherwise, he might as well remain a brahmachari – then he would not have to work hard to maintain a family and accept so many austerities and struggles to raise children and take care of a wife.
Similarly, for most women, it is of great importance to go through the experience of engaging their emotional nature in serving as a mother and affectionate caregiver. Playing this role offers a woman a lot of emotional satisfaction – more than a husband can give. In fact, the wife having a child may, to a certain degree, relieve a husband from the obligation of having to fulfil the emotional expectations of his wife.
We can oftentimes notice how a woman may become emotionally dry and unfulfilled if she does not have a child. Such emotional imbalance can be viewed as an unhealthy state of the subtle body which frequently manifests as health problems of the gross body. It goes to show that whenever we go against Krishna’s system and the laws of nature by trying to avoid some apparent inconveniences, it always backfires on us, causing us to suffer.
For these reasons, it is the duty of a husband to give his wife children – he cannot refuse. In a letter to Himavati dated 23rd March 1969, Srila Prabhupada expresses this point:
"Kardama Muni married a wife. Why he shall not give her children? The wife begged that she must have some children. So he must satisfy the wife and give her some children, that is the duty of the husband."
On the 3rd of April I flew on to Cape Town.....
Your servant, Devaki dd
When contemplating the idea of having children with a spiritual mindset, our question should not be ‘Do I want to have children?’ We should instead ask, ‘Is it beneficial for me to have children? Will it facilitate my purification and spiritual advancement?’ This approach reflects an entirely different consciousness. We leave ourselves open, and are ready to accept whatever is advisable for our purification – whatever Krishna and His devotees advise. It reflects a mood of submission, whereas the mundane approach reflects a mood of ‘I know best what is good for me.’
In spiritual life, the matter of concern is not what I like; it is rather what is recommended by our gurus, sadhus and the shastra.
After understanding the sacred purpose of sexuality served by the conception of a child, it becomes clear that there is not much room for the idea of entering marriage on the condition that one won’t have children. Otherwise, how will we engage our sexual desires in Krishna’s service and thereby purify it?
As a rule, when husband and wife live together, by the laws of nature, there will be sexual attraction. Let us remember that a most common reason for a man to enter family life is that he finds it difficult to control his senses and remain celibate lifelong. Otherwise, he might as well remain a brahmachari – then he would not have to work hard to maintain a family and accept so many austerities and struggles to raise children and take care of a wife.
Similarly, for most women, it is of great importance to go through the experience of engaging their emotional nature in serving as a mother and affectionate caregiver. Playing this role offers a woman a lot of emotional satisfaction – more than a husband can give. In fact, the wife having a child may, to a certain degree, relieve a husband from the obligation of having to fulfil the emotional expectations of his wife.
We can oftentimes notice how a woman may become emotionally dry and unfulfilled if she does not have a child. Such emotional imbalance can be viewed as an unhealthy state of the subtle body which frequently manifests as health problems of the gross body. It goes to show that whenever we go against Krishna’s system and the laws of nature by trying to avoid some apparent inconveniences, it always backfires on us, causing us to suffer.
For these reasons, it is the duty of a husband to give his wife children – he cannot refuse. In a letter to Himavati dated 23rd March 1969, Srila Prabhupada expresses this point:
"Kardama Muni married a wife. Why he shall not give her children? The wife begged that she must have some children. So he must satisfy the wife and give her some children, that is the duty of the husband."
On the 3rd of April I flew on to Cape Town.....
Your servant, Devaki dd
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